I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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