no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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