I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Randomize
