I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
