She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
