so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize
