I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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