We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I will be naked everywhere
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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