.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
