I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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