I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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