You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
