everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
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