Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
