And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
