U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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