She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
it's not cheating when I paid for it
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
