so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Come see our sink grown plant.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
