He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I think i got beer on your cat.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
