you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
This house was built for laser tag.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I need moral support for this bender
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize