fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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