My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
