I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Randomize
