they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
