it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
