Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
