So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
