Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
