my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
