Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just googled if crying burns calories
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Randomize
