ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
