They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
