you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
