At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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