Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Randomize
