If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
