how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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