Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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