when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Randomize
