Yo dont text me then not text me
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
