genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
