remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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