Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
