Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
