just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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