Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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