No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
