she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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