he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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