The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
